39-12-25 Sorting Christmas Cards

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON

• Vic is asleep on the davenport, and Rush insists Vic's only pretending to sleep.  Rush and Sade are sorting the family's Christmas cards: close friends in one heap, Vic's business acquaintances in another, and relatives in still another.
• Rush has re-arranged them according to size, which Sade rejects as unreasonable.
• There are cards from:  Elrod W. Floppman, kitchenware gink (Consolidated Kitchenware, Plant #7, Independence, Missouri): It's addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Victor Gook and son, Gush.
• E. Flyman Sweel sent a card.
• Aunt Ella and Uncle Arch: addressed to Mr. & Mrs. V.R. Gook and son, Roast.  Rush is angry about that: relations should know better.
• Rush tries to provoke Vic to speak, and Sade asks him to get up in case they get unexpected callers.  Vic ignores them.
• Another card:  addressed to Mr. & Mrs. Victor R. Gook and son Hash.  From Mr. and Mrs. F. G. Tisdel.  Rush insists Mildred addressed the card on purpose:  "I'd recognize her handwriting if I was sewed up in a sack."  It was no mistake because she wrote it on the card and the envelope.
• More cards:  I.K. Breep goes to the kitchenware stack; Sade can't get Vic to confirm Breep is one of Vic's business acquaintances.
• Howard C. Clutts of Vandalia, Illinois – they think he works at plant #24, but still can't get an answer out of Vic.
• H.G. Whife, director of the Sewage Disposal Workers' Semi-Classical Silver Cornet Band: Rush is pleased his name is spelled correctly.  Sade points out the last name is spelled "Goocke".  they put his card in a "miscellaneous" pile.
• Whaddams S. Heemslotch goes in the kitchenware stack. Rush believes he's with Consolidated Kitchenware Plant #10 in Mena, Arkansas.
• Vic refuses to be baited until they whisper again with a hint of someone dying.  Rush returns to the cards and finds: Alfred an' Myrna Wheester extend best wishes of the season to Mr. an' Mrs. Victor Gook an' son, Slush.  Rush: "What's the matter with the human race anymore?"
• Phone rings – Vic jumps to it, thinking it's Mr. Buller.  Mis' Applerot has phoned to tell Sade she's on some Thimble Club committee.
• Rush says: "Goin' back to sleep, Gov?"  Vic says to Rush: "Later on in the evening I hope to find time to break your arm." (This is the only line that Vic says in the whole episode.)
• Vic goes back to sleep and Rush muses, "When an individual lies down on the davenport an' closes their eyes, they feel like they got to pretend they're dead to the world."
• Sade reads another card: "Mr. and Mrs. Q. B. Sleetch extend wishes for a Merry Christmas an' a Happy New Year to Mr. and Mrs. Victor Gook and son, Fish." - compiled by Barbara Schwarz, edited by Jimbo Mason

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See the short script/synopsis
 
Christmas cards - people selling them, bad poetry and Rush's mangled names - were, of course, favorite subjects of writer Paul Rhymer.

For those keeping score at home, the different names for Rush on the Christmas cards in this episode: Gush, Roast, Hash, Slush and Fish.

The Consolidated Kitchenware plant in Mena, Arkansas is another link to Lum and Abner.  Mena was the hometown of Norris Goff and Chester Lauck, Lum and Abner.

H.G. Whife is mentioned as the director of the Sewage Disposal Workers' Semi-Classical Silver Cornet Band.  He would not hold that position much longer.  In 1940, Ed Whinnie would become the band leader.

It's quite possible that Art Van Harvey was not in this episode and the line he "spoke" might have been from a transcription disc.  It was during this time that Van Harvey was ill with heart problems and it is unknown (by me anyway) exactly when he returned.  See this for further details.