38-07-04 Vic's Toothache

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON

Vic has a sore tooth and needs to go to the dentist. He obviously doesn't want to go, using a date with pal Ike Kneesuffer and a game of indoor horseshoes as his excuse. Finally, Sade forces him to call the dentist and when does, he finds out his dentist is on vacation.

SEE SOME DIALOGUE AND THE SYNOPSIS

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There's little here to suggest that this was anything but an average episode.

However, the Barbara Schwarz synopsis seems to point out that it was just a few days before this episode that the Smelly Clark's-Uncle Strap-Peoria-fish-dinner story first began. This episode has Rush bring up the story for another go-round.

Something that seems to be missing here is Rush being childishly subversive (either accidentally or on purpose) with the purpose of helping Sade push Vic to go to the dentist. 

TRIVIA:

* This story most likely was broadcast on July 4 - no wonder Doc Keevy was on vacation. But why would his secretary be working on a national holiday?

* Sade says: "Harley Eepers there in Dixon used to love sittin' in the dentist chair." Vic: "Harley Eepers, if you'll recall, was later committed to the insane asylum." Sade: "Sure. Because a horse kicked him in the head." Vic: "He kicked the horse first, didn't he?"

* Miss Kligg is Dr. Keevy's secretary.

* Vic has a date to play indoor horseshoors with Ike Kneesuffer. Usually (but not always), Vic uses indoor horseshoes as an escape from a grumpy or way-too-prodding or critical Sade.

* In an earlier episode (1932) Rush and Vic are both needing to see Dr. Keevy, but he's out of town.  It's possible that this script was a re-hash of that earlier one.

40-01-25 Uncle Fletcher Sends Seeds

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON

Sade gets a package in the mail from her Uncle Fletcher.  He's heard she's into gardening and has sent her all kinds of seeds.

SEE SOME DIALOGUE AND THE SYNOPSIS

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What I imagine when I read the above, is Uncle Fletcher doing a dandy, nice thing; sending exotic seeds to his niece and family - but probably putting all the seeds together, where one who didn't know, wouldn't know one seed from the next.

Why did Fletcher send seeds?  Obviously, after hearing about the Gooks having control over a vegetable garden (in an episode just 13 days prior) he sent the seeds.

Trivia:

+ Sade referred to the beef punkles as, "boiling beef".

+ A fictional detective was mentioned, "Firpo Vance."  In other episodes, "Philo Vance" and "Philco Vance" have been mentioned.

+ Found among the seeds: a sewing button, a thumbtack, a pill, bottle-cap, a tooth, a peach pit and an earring.

+ Uncle Fletcher's letter says the seeds include "Common varieties of radishes, onions, spinach, and so forth, many types of rare an' exotic vegetables: the South American semi-poison Hedge Banana, for instance.  Also, the Dismal Swamp Sugar Beet an' the Speckled Snake-Squash.  This latter may be identified by its shape – rather like a human being's thumb-nail."

41-12-09 Hank Appointed Lodge's Best-Looking Man

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON

Vic has news to tell that he knows will bring Sade's scoffing and ridicule: Hank Gutstop has been elected as the lodge's Best-looking Man!

SEE THE SCRIPT (part 1) (part 2)

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There's really not much to this script; it's just an excuse to put down the lodge and Gutstop. Sade doesn't think Hank is good-looking at all, and the ritualistic way in which he was chosen (blonde boy pulls his name out of a hat) is just a reminder of just how silly the lodge can be.

Trivia:

+ Rush mentions that he was reading about counterfeiting parachute jumpers in his Third Lieutenant Stanley book.

+ Gutstop was at the Lazy Hours Pool Hall playing bottle-pool.

+ Rush is bursting with knowledge again about the various idioms his parents are dishing out.  However, they could care less.  Rush seems to know his idiom sources quite well.

+ Instead of borrowing funds from Vic to buy new clothes, this time Hank just wants to borrow Vic's nice clothes (but not his socks).

+ Cuddy Jackson was mentioned. A member of the Sacred Stars of the Milky Way lodge. He stands four feet, eleven inches tall, is bald and has no teeth.

+ This episode aired two days after the attack on Pearl Harbor.  You wonder what kind of mood the listener may have been in and if this episode made them happy or if they even cared?

40-12-26 Gumpox's Traveling Bed

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON

There's big-doings at the Bright Kentucky Hotel as Rush, his pals and a
newspaper reporter have been invited by Mr. Gumpox to witness occupied beds traveling down hallways, passing each other!  This is just another of the bizarre things that happen in their crazy world.

SEE THE SCRIPT (part 1) (part 2)

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Yes, it's all true... and Vic and Sade are so enthralled with the story that they allow Rush to be out past 1 a.m.

Sade wants to tell the story to Mis' Donahue, who's bound to laugh out loud.

Trivia:

+ Blue Tooth's real name is William Gazelle Johnson.

+ There's yet another barber (who works at the Butler House Hotel's barbershop) living at the Bright Kentucky: Cunningham.  His bed is prone to take off too, when the long, heavy trains barrel past the run-down eyesore.

+ Mr. Gumpox says that when they are in bed and he passes Cunningham in the hall, they wave at each other and say, ''Ta ta'' and ''Bon voyage'', respectively.

+ According to Sade, it appears that sometime prior to this episode, a train jumped the tracks and plowed into Gumpox's room.  That'd be a fine how-do-you-do, wouldn't it?

+ Though we have heard and read accounts of beds traveling down the halls of the Bright Kentucky, this is the first account we have in script form.

42-07-12 Uncle Fletcher Gives Up His Bed

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN, BILL IDELSON AND CLARENCE HARTZELL

• Uncle Fletcher refers to Mis' Gilfop and her married daughter, Fern.  Her brother, Ying-Yang Britcher, fell off a 5-story building and still lived. Her other brother was named Edith!
• Mis' Keller's visitors are taking up room at her house, so Fletcher intends to get a room at the Bright Kentucky, but Sade insists he stay with the Gooks.
• Uncle Fletcher tells the story of Charlie Haverstraw from Belvidere who moved to Terre Haute, Ohio, married a  woman 26 years old, but she ran away.  So, he married a woman 36 years old and she ran away. then he married a woman 46 years old and she ran away, too. Finally, he married a woman 56 years old that lost her leg in a train wreck. She couldn't run away from him. - compiled by Barbara Schwarz, edited by Jimbo Mason

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We know that Sade doesn't like Uncle Fletcher to go near the Bright Kentucky Hotel at night because she is afraid he'll trip over the tracks and be run over by a "creepin', monstrous locomotive."  Of course, after a while at staying at the Gooks, Sade will be ready to get rid of him, for he will drive them all crazy.

Despite there being little information available about this episode, it's fortunate that these two stories from Uncle Fletcher are preserved.  They fit perfectly into his lore.

Note: If you ever desire to read all of the Uncle Fletcher stories, it's pretty simple to do.  Just click this link (which is easily found on the left-hand side of Vic and Sade Characters) and read each of the entries.  There are dozens of them, many with the audio stories, where available.

42-09-16 Smelly Clark's Fascinating Gold Watch

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON

Rush tells the story of a gold pocket watch that Smelly Clark owns and isn't supposed to touch until he's 21.  Rush persuades Gov to repeatedly ask Smelly (whose real name we find out is "Roger Willoughby Clark") what time it is when he comes over for a visit, so that he can properly show off the luxurious item.

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This episode has a counterpart in the 42-09-21 Smelly Clark's Broken Watch episode.

This episode was apparently just recently found and may be available soon, but this is something that is unconfirmed. It does, however, seem to to be a new disc find.  

This audio episode is available at the University of Missouri-Kansas City (Marr collection).

The title is one I have given the episode only as a point of reference.

42-07-2x Vic's Inspection Tour

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON

Consolidated Kitchenware has made plans to send Vic on a month-long business tour.  Just days earlier, Vic was given a shower by the Thimble Club ladies (which I'm certain he felt uncomfortable about). And now, they plan to see him off on the train as well and part of the plan is throw sawdust all over him.

Vic has strong reservations about this, since his bosses Misters Buller and Ruebush will be with him and he doesn't want them covered in sawdust!

But it gets even more dicey - "the girls from the office" (including Lolita di Rienzi) are also coming along for the ride!

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Trivia:

+ Rush says people might get the impression Vic has just gotten married (because of the sawdust).

+ The "kids from the office" may be carrying flowers, according to Vic.

+ At the end of the episode, Sade says she isn't mad and does not seem mad, so we assume she is NOT mad.  So why is that Vic is upset, when he mutters, "Dog gone! Dog gone! Dog gone!"?
 
Download the complete commercial-free, sound-improved episode!  

44-05-05 Rish Fish's Short Career

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND RUSSELL MILLER

Almost the very same story as 39-06-21 Hank's Job Royal Throne Barbershop, except Rishigan Fishigan gets the job instead of Hank Gutstop and Russell Miller is in the episode instead of Rush.

SEE THE SCRIPT  (part 1) (part 2)

40-08-12 Sade's House is Not the Way She Left It

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

Sade's come home from a trip to Carberry and notices the house is surprisingly clean but things are not exactly where they were when she left.

She comes to find out that (mostly) Blue Tooth Johnson made a mess and Rush had to clean it up.  He gets a few things mixed up but for the most part, Sade seems surprised and pleased.

SEE THE SCRIPT

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Vic broke an olive and pickle plate but Sade wasn't in the least bit upset. Fifteen months later, Sade would be very upset when Rush would break her antique pickle and olive shoe and still seething, would even write a poem about it 11 months later to convey her feelings.

40-03-08 Rush's Slumber Party Enters by the Window

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

Rush's slumber party gets out of hand. There are 12 boys plus Rush.

Rush has tried to do the courteous thing by putting the ladder up to his window, that way it cuts down on the wear and tear of the carpet and prevents the boys from tracking in dirt. What it does though is attract the neighbors, who fear the Gooks might be getting robbed or attacked.

SEE THE SCRIPT

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Thirteen boys can create considerable noise and damage.

Sade is embarrassed the neighbors are calling.

Rush was only trying to do what he thought was the right thing.

39-07-13 Vic Explains How a Doorbell Rings

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

Mr. Erickson, the Gook landlord, gifts Sade with a brand new doorbell.  Vic is going to install it but wants to school Sade and Rush on how the thing works.

As usual, they aren't really listening and instead want to either tease Vic or Vic simply isn't explaining it the right way.

Either way, he quietly gets infuriated with them, just as Rush was infuriated with Nicer Scott earlier in the day.

SEE THE SCRIPT

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Nicer claims to have no sense of taste. He also claims to have 89 pairs of pants in cold storage (what is with Paul Rhymer and pants in cold storage?)

Vic says in this episode:

VIC: I know electric bells like I know the palm of my hand. 

This in reference to the doorbell gift Sade received from Mr. Erickson.  Recall there was the time that he could not fix the Donahue doorbell.  And many clocks have alarms, even electric ones.  And we know the problems Vic has with clocks.

39-03-01 Rooster's Block of Theater Seats

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

Rooster Davis is about to "rock the foundation of civilization" again with a stunt that's never happened before in the history of the United States: he's going to rope off a big section of the Bijou, come in wearing a big long coat with a fur collar and be the biggest bigshot ever.

Vic and Sade, at first, deduce a scheme to get out of studying, but slowly they are sucked into the drama that Rush is able to create - and by the end of the script Vic and Sade have made plans to go to Bijou to watch the proceedings.

SEE THE SCRIPT

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Paul Rhymer wrote many scripts 1937-1940 where Rush takes the lead role and tells a tantalizing story about one of his friends.  Those stories are some of the best; this one being no exception.

Rooster has a bit of his big brother Rotten inside of him!

38-12-16 Rooster Davis' New Spectacles

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

While the Gooks wait for the noontime meat to get done,  Rush says that Rooster Davis came to school this day, wearing glasses.  That's not a big deal.

What is a big deal is how the glasses were attached to him.  Not by hooks around his ears, but by a very long black ribbon (more than 6 feet long) that was attached to a brooch with fake diamonds!

SEE THE SCRIPT

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The script begins with an unusual letter from Bess; this one goes into a bit of detail about Walter's kneecap and Bess even makes a joke, saying his kneecap has "gone off the reservation" - that is, his kneecap is on the "warpath."

For Bess, who doesn't make jokes (despite her literary "ha ha's")  that was a fairly special joke.

Horse!

RUSH: I could eat a fried horse, harness an' all.

and then later...

RUSH: I'll be delighted to make it plain as a horse. 

and then later... 

RUSH: I'll be delighted to make it plain as a horse why Rooster's glasses threw a bomb-shell that hit civilization. 

40-11-22 Third Lieutenant Stanley - Bright Kentucky Hotel

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

In an episode that will remind you of 42-03-xx Mis' Applerot's Petition, Sade comes home from her Thimble Club meeting upset that Mis' Appelrot hijacked the ladies with a silly petition to knock down the Bright Kentucky Hotel.

SEE THE SCRIPT

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This is actually the earlier of the two scripts and it appears as though the scripts are similar, there was a major re-working done in the other script.

This script does not include Rush saying over and over, "I will not sign!" (the petition) but he does allude to the fact that Uncle Strap and Mr. Gumpox would be out of a job and a place to live, respectively.

This episode is also full of Rush reading from an unnamed Third Lieutenant Stanley novel.  He reads:

Third Lieutenant Stanley gave the villainous crew of counterfeiting smugglers one supercilious glance. Then his eyes softened as he turned and gazed at the oval face of Lady Margaret. The beautiful woman smiled bravely, revealing twin rows of perfect teeth the rich color of old ivory. Her hand trembled slightly as she twirled her dainty pink parasol and her small foot in its fashionable French spat tapped nervously. Third Lieutenant Stanley touched her arm. "Let us share a hug an' kiss before we fight these miserable wretches," he grunted. Nothing loath, the beautiful woman lifted her veil an' thrust her lovely head forward. Jabbering amongst themselves, the counterfeiting smugglers watched the exchange of tender caresses an' there was a burst of rude laughter as Third Lieutenant Stanley began to cry. "Sweetheart," he blubbered, "Five minutes from now I may be dead. But, sweetheart, I want you to know that my love for you transcends everything in...   The handsome young officer faced death valiantly. "You fellows can go jump in the creek, I'm not scared," he growled to the leader of the counterfeiting smugglers. But for Lady Margaret he had a sweet smile an' eyes that twinkled merrily. "Give me one more kiss an' one more hug before I kick the bucket, sweetheart," he gloated. The beautiful woman simpered and coquettishly pretended that the mother-of-pearl buttons on her fashionable French spats had come unbuttoned. Finally, blushing furiously, she lifted her veil an' thrust forward her lovely head. "Just one hug an' one kiss now," she warned an' Third Lieutenant Stanley howled loudly his satisfaction an' approval.

The best part of the book was a part he did not get to read, but instead, gives us the juicy details:

The counterfeiting smugglers try to murder Third Lieutenant Stanley by tying him to a tree an' smearing melted marshmallow all over his clothes an' releasing two grizzly bears from a cage. Grizzly bears are very fond of melted marshmallow so it looks like curtains for Third Lieutenant Stanley.

While in the world of Vic and Sade, ridiculous things happen to all of the characters, the things that happen to them must not break the laws of physics or nature - that is, the world of Vic and Sade is a real world.

The world of books and motion pictures, however, go beyond ridiculous, even in the world of Vic and Sade.  The marshmallows and the grizzly bears are an example of this, as are most Third Lieutenant Stanley novels dealing with animals.

There is a story in this episode about Mr. Gumpox that is well worth pointing out.  Rush explains:

He'll be asleep an' a fast passenger train'll flash by the Bright Kentucky sixty or seventy miles an hour an' by George the building starts to shake from the vibration an' he'll ride all around the room in his doggone bed just like you'd ride around in an automobile. One time he rode right outta the bedroom into the hall-way. Woke up the next morning in the hall by the fire-escape, thirty-five feet from the spot where he'd retired.

In an audio interview conducted in the 1970's, Jean Shepherd relayed this same story, but confused Gumpox with Rishigan Fishigan. [There may have been an episode like this about Fishigan, but consider that we know that Fishigan lived on the penthouse floor and the ground floor would be much closer to the trains than the penthouse.  It is also inferred that Fishigan was the only roomer on the penthouse floor.  So we assume that Shepherd was simply incorrect.]

36-xx-xx Rabbit Hunting from the Back Porch

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

Vic brings home a gun he's borrowed from a friend.  One day they are going rabbit hunting.  Meanwhile, Vic wants to practice shooting off the porch but Sade, who dislikes guns, forbids it.

Then Rush comes home and pretends with his dad that they are shooting the gun.

SEE THE SCRIPT

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Vic is very childlike when it comes to certain things.  A gun is one of those things.

Sarah Cole examines the subject of Sade Gook and guns here.  

37-02-04 Smelly Clark to Change His Age from 16 to 21

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

Rush practically demands his parent's attention.  He has big news: Smelly Clark wants to change his age from 16 to 21 so that he can become a barber.

Smelly is disappointed that all he can currently do around the shop are menial tasks, such as sweep up.  If he could legally change his age - like people change their names - he could become a barber.

SEE THE SCRIPT
HEAR A READING OF THE SCRIPT (by Shambles Constant) 

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I'm guessing that Smelly failed to legally change his age since instead of acting grown up in future episodes, he remains a 15 to 16 year old kid.

Smelly's ambition to be a barber would later lead him to butchering Rush's hair.  Perhaps it's a good thing he didn't get his age changed.

44-04-24 Howard, the Runaway

STARRING: BERNARDINE FLYNN AND RUSSELL MILLER

• In the alley behind Graham Street, Howard suddenly bolted – all the way to Seminary Avenue. 
• Russell: "…shrill screaming and high-pitched yells of wild-eyed people."
• Russell: "Howard lost a good many true friends by his rash action."  Mr. Gumpox cried at having been betrayed by his old friend.
• Smelly Clark thinks Howard did it out of boredom, Heine Call thinks he was startled out of an exciting dream. Oyster Krecker thinks he was just blowing off steam.
• Mis' Razorscum thinks he was probably bit by an insect (also Sade's idea).
• Russell resolves to stand by Howard unless and until "it's proven his action was deliberately malicious."
• Russell (about Howard): "He's innocent as the new-mown hay." - compiled by Barbara Schwarz, edited by Jimbo Mason

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Howard is a horse most everyone loves.  But at this point in his life, he was a bit of a dangerous creature.

Two months later, he would knock holes in two garbage boxes, perhaps the product of getting loose and creating helter skelter.

37-01-22 Vic is 'Arch' to Old Friend

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

Ed Staker, the newly-elected Exalted Little Dipper of the Sleepy Saturn Chapter of the Sacred Stars of the Milky Way in St. Paul, Minnesota, wants Vic to be his best man at his upcoming wedding. But Ed barely knows Vic and in a letter to him, keeps calling him "Arch."

Vic wants to go, but Sade thinks it's ridiculous - he doesn't know Vic well enough to even remember his name.

SEE THE SCRIPT

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If Ed was in the lodge, you wonder if Sade would be so dead set against the trip to Minnesota?

It's mentioned that Vic's best man was a fellow by the name of Harley Eggsocket.

Smelly Clark has given Rush an open invitation to be his best man when he marries and he plans on marrying several different ladies in his lifetime.

42-09-21 Smelly Clark's Broken Watch

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON

Rush tells his parents that Smelly Clark has broken the gold pocket watch he received for a gift (and wasn't supposed to to touch until he turned 21).  He needs $9.00 to fix it.  He is in a terrible mess.  Rush would like to withdraw $9.00 from his savings account, but you know what Sade will say...  So, Vic and Sade, feeling compassion for Smelly's plight, lend the funds needed to him to have the watch repaired.

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This synopsis comes from the October 3, 1942 issue of Billboard magazine and can be found here.

Additional information was obtained from the book, Vic and Sade on the Radio: A Cultural History of Paul Rhymer's Daytime Series.

This episode was apparently just recently found and may be available soon, but this is something that is unconfirmed. It does, however, seem to to be a new disc find.  

This audio episode is available at the University of Missouri-Kansas City (Marr collection).

40-06-21 Hank's Job - Royal Throne Barbershop

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND BILL IDELSON 

Vic is excited.  He's just gotten off the telephone with his pal, Hank Gutstop, who informs him that he's gotten a new job at the Royal Throne 25 Cent Barbershop.

He procured the job by coming up with ideas to help improve business, plus he knows so many fellows in town that Ed Holvey, the shop owner, decided to give him a job.

But Hank, who has a bad history with holding a job, may not last the whole afternoon...

MIS' CROWE SAYS:
Hank has a new job as a publicity manager for the Royal Throne Barbershop. Vic shares some of his ideas.

Hank has stumbled upon yet another job opportunity that will benefit him more than it will benefit his employers (free room and board, free lunch, and free haircuts included), but he can’t even hang onto that for a whole episode. Vic’s unending faith in him, given his employment history, is touching. Hank’s ideas are intriguing, but I’m not sure how well they’d actually work. Free lunch in a barbershop seems a little unsanitary. I’m worried you’d end up with hair clippings in your sandwich.
I’m always struck by this little moment in this episode:

SADE: I had quite a little conversation with Mis’ Eapers today.
VIC: How’s she?
SADE: All right. Little leaner than she was, I thought.
VIC: How’s TJ?
SADE: I never asked after TJ. Kinda afraid to, don’t ya know. After he was in jail those four times a person anymore kinda hates to inquire. Might make it embarrassin’.

"Vic and Sade" is full of little details like this — just passing comments that help add depth to the fictional community. Often they’re humorous or idyllic, but not always. Small towns all have those little things that everybody knows about but are too afraid, embarrassed, or polite to talk about. This moment always feels a little jarring to me because Vic and Sade talk about things like this so seldom. It’s also jarring because of the actors’ line readings — it’s the kind of thing that could have been played for laughs or not, depending on how the actors read it, and it is definitely not a humorous read (because Vic and Sade wouldn’t joke about this kind of thing). Listen to Vic’s voice, low and serious and sounding as if he’s anticipating bad news, when he asks "How’s TJ?", and Sade’s concerned tone as she answers. Notice, also, that she waits until Rush is out of the room before she even brings this subject up. Much like Rhymer’s rare and oblique references to World War II, this reference reminds you that darkness exists in Vic and Sade’s world — it just stays in the background, in other people’s lives. It’s these little details that add verisimilitude to "Vic and Sade" and make it the great portrayal of life that it is.

SEE THE SCRIPT (transcribed by Lydia Crowe)

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Trivia:

+ Rush infers that Hank once had a job selling homemade candy.

+ Some of Hank's barbershop ideas include:

• Free lunch - there was no talk of what this may constitute.
• Improving the appearance of the barbershop - no details were given
• Every 50th haircut free - Rush worked it out that it may take three years to get a free haircut.

+ Ed Holvey is always sleeping in the barber chair.  Rush says he lives there - Hank had plans to live there too (also sleeping a barber chair) as part of his payment.

+ Mr. Sludge came home crying again this day.

+ The barbershop is a hot place, according to Rush - no breeze can get in there.

+ Jim Skooner at the Butler House hotel barbershop is Vic's regular barber.

+ Sade called the shop 'dirty' and 'dingy.'

Perhaps it's a joke but a look at Google and "royal throne" brings up as many toilet references as royalty references.

Download the complete commercial-free, sound-improved episode!