Search This Blog

44-01-04 Vic's Bottom Dresser Drawer Violated

STARRING: ART VAN HARVEY, BERNARDINE FLYNN AND  DAVID WHITEHOUSE
  • Despite a sacred agreement not to fuss with Vic's bottom dresser drawer, Sade's housekeeping sense caused her to violate the pact.  She saw a necktie sticking out and went into a cleaning frenzy.  She tries to blame Vic for saving an entire Sunday paper just to preserve the line "B. B. Baugh of the Bright Kentucky Hotel spent Tuesday in Peoria."  Vic insists Sade abide by their agreement and return everything:  loose tobacco, shoe-horns, belt buckles, chewing gum, table knives, a tennis ball…
  • Vic asks Russell to read more facts from his book, "My Golden Treasury of Startling Facts," to keep him calm and not dwell on the violation of his dresser drawer.  Russell reads:
  • "Ladies in Texas have bluer eyes than ladies in Oklahoma."
  • "The origin of ‘giddap' is attributed to Charles S. Giddap of Sweet Esther.  Giddap was a great friend of all animals.  He was born July 11, 1803 and died December 2, 1880."
  • "Kissing among Eskimo tribes of the far north is gradually dwindling. Sam Slurper, noted explorer, reports that he saw only one kiss exchanged between these hardy people in all the years he spend in that frosty region."
  • "Hogs enjoy eating coal, lemons, paper plates, and that gray, feathery substance one sees underneath the bed before Mother dusts."
  • Vic (referring to Morry Flootcher at the office): "He's been bald-headed ever since he was eighteen years old and isn't any more sensitive about it than your undershirt."
  • Russell continues reading:  "The use of water to extinguish fires dates back over eighty years."
  • "In southern Indiana and northern Kentucky little children address their mamas as ‘papa' and their papas as ‘mama'.  This quaint custom is a source of much confusion and hearty laughter on the part of visitors from other sections of the country."
  • "Certain Indian tribes of North America eat cigars as well as smoke them."
  • "Beautiful women on the island of Punkly – 39 miles off the coast of Puerto Rico prepare a deadly poison from sliced bananas, rain-water, and old people."
  • "The use of the term ‘square' as applied to boxes is derived from boomix, a by-product of petroleum."
  • "Arnold L. Shoppe of Dismal Seepage, Ohio was the first man east of the Mississippi river to wear shoes.  His brother, Ernest, holds the distinction of being the first man east of the Mississippi to wear a hat, and his sister Bessie claims to be the first woman east of the Mississippi to wear gloves.  All three passed away August 11, 1905, while appearing in a tent-show near Fiendish, Indiana."
  • "A simple way to manufacture mucilage at home is boil a pair of ordinary leather shoes eight hours in…"
  • "Contrary to popular belief, Michigan is south of Texas." - compiled by Barbara Schwarz, edited by Jimbo Mason
SEE THE SCRIPT (part 1) (part 2)
____________________
A wacky episode which may remind you of 40-03-29 No, Vic, No Trip to Chicago where Rush is reading from his book, "Interesting Facts About Darkest Africa."  Both books indeed contain some amazing "facts."

Sade seems to disappear after she's been busted for violating Vic's drawer.  I wonder where she went?

No comments:

Post a Comment