44-04-10 Back Porch Small Talk

STARRING: BERNARDINE FLYNN AND CLARENCE HARTZELL

Sade and Fletcher are chatting on the back porch on a warm spring day.
Sade's mind is on the beautiful weather, Fletcher's mind is on Virgil L. Guthrie's interesting life.

When they both speak at once, Fletcher says it means "one of us is going to take a trip to Detroit, Michigan." By the end of the episode they're up to nine trips to Detroit, Michigan.

According to Fletcher, Virgil L. Guthrie was a good deal like Ted (Fred) Stembottom: same shape head and same color complexion - married an Independence, Missouri woman 37 years old. When he was 41 years old his papa bought him a violin and hired a stylish music teacher and bought a music rack and had his oldest daughter make him a velvet pad full of sand to rest his chin on, but he couldn't master the instrument for love or money. He tried and sweat and scraped and worried and clawed and bit and yelled and stewed and moaned and... He made the music by hitting himself on the head with the violin and opening and closing his mouth, but it was sort of a hollow sounding, gurgly, coconut shell kind of music, but it caught on with the public. He would pass the hat after 15 or 20 solos and maybe show a profit of 5 or 6 dollars in a single evening - the tragedy was that it damaged his health. He wanted to give good measure for his pay and perform good loud music so that the spectators standing way back in the crowd could hear it, so he hit himself extra hard - his wife had to apply a fresh bandage after every concert. He eventually grew a little simple and childish from hitting himself on the head so much.

The original script had 14 pages, we have 12 of those pages here:

See the partial script (opening) (part 1) (part 2)